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Wednesday, December 31, 2008

Wishing you a year with an abundance of love and peace, and fulfillment of all your desires.

As a new year approaches many of us will take this new beginning as a time to reflect on the past year…assess our wins and our loses and begin to set our agenda for the coming year. We will compile a list of things we hope to accomplish and habits and behaviors we hope to transform. For many of us this years list will appear remarkably similar to last years list and perhaps the year priors as well….Why is that?

Action expresses priorities.
Mohandas Gandhi

Intentions reveal the best of who we would like to be, or how we would best like to act in a situation…
( little clarity here… by saying BEST, best is meant as level of measure … not, best, as in highest moral fiber…). Be it a lifestyle action…(exercise more, save more money, write more…paint more...eat less …work more…work less), or a relationship action …(do X for someone…stop doing X to someone) we often start out with the greatest of intentions … but somewhere along way…somewhere, they can get a tad diluted or even completely neglected.
Why is that? We know what we want… we know how we want to perform in a certain way...we acknowledge what we are going to do, what our intentions are...and yet??? Our intentions change?? Did we set too high expectations in the first place? Most likely no…most likely our intentions were not supported by our priorities. At first glance, we might say, “no, I really wanted to do….but …..got in the way”. More often than not what prevents us from achieving our intentions is current behavior patterns. By allowing something else to take precedent over our intentions, what we often find is our reluctance for change.
By identifying change, (reluctance of) as the source of the impediment we can begin to rewire the flow of thought, conscious and unconscious to be in line with our intentions.
Take for example, exercise, you have an extremely busy lifestyle, work, social obligations and what time is left you prefer to enjoy quietly with family and friends. However you are often tired but you know that you need exercise to feel your best, so you tell yourself you will begin to exercise everyday after work. Now although your intentions are sound and justified, unless you begin an inner dialogue with yourself identifying the needed change ( time spent with family and friends verses time spent exercising) and can convince yourself that the change will be more beneficial to your overall life…as committed to your intention as you believe you are …most likely it will not come to fruition.
For our intentions to yield results we must employ our inner GPS and clearly identify and acknowledge the obstacles, the current behaviors that may impede our success. Then decide if the compensation is worth changing them.
Think of an intention as a new enthusiastic Chairman of the Board and your inner thoughts and behaviors the reluctant “Old Guard”…they have their comfort zone and are quite happy there. To turn the tides you must have their support...and that will be gained through understanding of how things are currently operating then identifying the advantages of the change and show a solid plan on how to implement the change.
So with your next intention...no matter the level of intensity make a list of what changes you would need to make in order to complete your intention…(thought changes, lifestyle changes, concrete changes..) look at how the changes will affect you…weigh them and if the payoff from the implementing the intention out weights the results from keeping things as they are…you have a strong chance for success!! Good Luck.
Suzi

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Peace on earth...Goodwill to Man

How would our lives differ…how would the world differ… if we were hardwired to act in manners that only promoted Peace on earth and goodwill towards Man, if we innately knew that we were all interconnected? If thoughts or visions of fellow sufferings were felt with equal intensity as our personal sufferings….how would that have shaped our world?
Perhaps that is how we were wired, but along the way personal and or maternal/paternal survival instinct trumped it, …as life presented challenges that threatened our personal/ family survival we began to make choices to ensure our continued existence, many times at the cost of another’s life. Is it, as we continue to evolve it is our will to live that is strengthened and dictates our actions towards others, while silencing our hearts when they ache for those trampled in the quest?
Or perhaps as we evolve we begin to shift from a myopic view of the world where the universe is seen only in its relationship to us, to our needs and wants, to where the lens begins to widen, we begin to see what we have really known all along, that the world is one, one interconnected and interdependent body of life. With us being just another integral part, no greater nor lesser than any other part. We begin to listen to our hearts and to truly understand that Peace on earth and goodwill to Man is paramount to global survival, and global survival is vital to our personal survival.
Whether it is evolution or enlightenment it is happening…it is here, in every pocket of the world you can find evidence of this thought/understanding…you can find individuals and groups sacrificing for the greater good. You can see the seeds of hope and compassionate caring as they grow and alter the landscapes of some of the worlds most barren vistas.
You can be a part of this shift…turn up the volume on your heart, take action where and when you can…and remember that even the smallest positive action can cause monumental changes. It will take all of us…. individually and collectively to bring peace on earth….but we have the power to do so!!!!

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

Tis the season of JOY...


Tis the season of Joy…
For those of us that joy seems to eludes on a daily basis, the pressure is all the greater this time of year…pressure to feel the joy...show the joy…share the joy. That pressure alone is enough to keep joy far at bay. So what if we decided to not buy into the pressure…to just feel how we do feel…stop listening to the media and others telling us how we should feel…and start listening to ourselves?

What would we hear…perhaps our own voices…perhaps we would begin to understand what truly does bring us joy and peace. Perhaps we would be surprised to find that we have achieved many of the goals that give us the inner peace we thought we were striving for in vain. So we must indulge in our own quite…let our minds wonder to the people and places in our lives, past and present…look into our memories…and look at our dreams….what thoughts put an involuntary smile on our face? What memory causes our hearts to skip a beat…and begin our personal journey to finding our joy. For those of us that joy seems to eludes on a daily basis, the pressure is all the greater this time of year…pressure to feel the joy...show the joy…share the joy.
That pressure alone is enough to keep joy far at bay. So what if we decided to not buy into the pressure…to just feel how we do feel…stop listening to the media and others telling us how we should feel…and start listening to ourselves? What would we hear…perhaps our own voices…perhaps we would begin to understand what truly does bring us joy and peace. Perhaps we would be surprised to find that we have achieved many of the goals that give us the inner peace we thought we were striving for in vain.

So we must indulge in our own quite…let our minds wonder to the people and places in our lives, past and present…look into our memories…and look at our dreams….what thoughts put an involuntary smile on our face? What memory causes our hearts to skip a beat…and begin our personal journey to finding our joy.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Today marks the 60th anniversary of the signing of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.

Today marks the 60th anniversary of the signing of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.
Borne out of the horrors of WWII and the Holocaust, the Universal Declaration of Human Rights is the foundation of international human rights law, it was the first universal statement outlining a common standard of achievement for all peoples and all nations stating the basic principles of inalienable human rights and guaranteeing the political and civic rights of all people, including the right to freedom from torture, slavery, poverty, homelessness and other forms of oppression. The Declaration represents a contract between governments and their peoples, and the people have a right to demand that this document be respected and fulfilled.
Although it has been sixty years since this document was created and great strides have been made due to its existence, its goals are still far from being achieved. Currently, torture is an acceptable practice in at least 81 countries, people face unfair trials in at least 54 countries and in at least 77 countries freedom of speech is punishable.
To ensure that the mission of the Declaration will be not only remembered in history lessons but will be alive and dictate the behavior and conduct of governments and that we will find its commitments woven through international treaties and national constitutions and laws. It will demand action…continued action...monumental action, taken by nations and small actions, taken by individual citizens. Together we must make a commitment to ensure “that recognition of the inalienable rights of all members of the human family is the foundation of freedom, justice and peace in the world”

Friday, December 5, 2008

Be a part of Amnesty International's Global Write-A-Thon--December 5-14! Your letters can save a life!

"Amnesty International's and its members' strengths have been the realization of the release of prisoners of conscience and the establishment of justice around the world where it is long overdue. The letter writing campaign has been a vital weapon in this regard.
It has kept hope alive for all those unjustly incarcerated and has also kept extra judicial governments in check, including our own." - Serj Tankian, System Of A Down singer and solo artist

Save the Date. Save a Life. Register Today!
Be a part of Amnesty International's Global Write-A-Thon--December 5-14! Your letters can save a life!
Register for the write-a-thon as an individual or as a group. Watch as your pledges help light up the Amnesty candle. Spread the word! Encourage your friends and family to get involved by texting or emailing them the link to register: www.amnestyusa.org/writeathon Check out the write-a-thon resources online. This site will provide you with everything you need to participate, including case sheets, sample letters, a checklist for how to plan an event, and promotional materials. For hard copies, please email writeathon@aiusa.org
Write and mail letters from December 5-14. After the Write-a-thon be sure to report back to let us know how many letters were sent. You can either fill out our online evaluation or send us an email at writeathon@aiusa.org.

Friday, November 28, 2008

Paying Attention...


One of the strongest weapons in our arsenal we can employ to create a more peaceful world is often overlooked and undervalued, it is our attention.
Paying attention to each other, those we see in our daily lives as well as those continents away that we may never see, improves our lives… others lives, as well as the climate of the world.
We may not be able to change the frustrations or quell the challenges others face, but by taking the time to listen and trying to understand their plight it can give hope. When someone really takes the time to listens it sends the signal that we matter…that our voice is heard, which gives us strength.
Listening to each others stories also helps to narrow the divide between individuals and cultures, the more we engage with each other the more we begin to recognize our similarities as human beings and citizens of the earth….and discover that at our core we all share the same basic emotional and physical needs for survival.
So as many of us fly through life at warp speed lets try to be mindful of hearing the need for attention and try to allocate a few moments of our day to listening.
Thanks for listening!!

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Thank you...

On the eve of the day of thanks, I would like to take a moment and thank you…everyone of you for all the things you do to make this world a better place. Each one of you and your positive actions count and make a difference in our lives…so again thank you and enjoy the day!

Sunday, November 16, 2008

Hearing the Call

If we are all one interconnected body of life…if we are responsible to each other and for each other, how can we stand back and watch cruel and injustices inflicted upon our brothers the world over and feel little and do less? Or is it that we do feel the pain …a great pain, but when we believe that we cannot alter the events the feeling of inadequacy and helplessness is so great that as self protection we detach and retreat? Do we foresee any actions that we personally may be capable of as totally insignificant…almost laughable, like a hungry person picking up a dirty penny left on the street thinking it will make a difference. Does that feeling cause us to abandoning our intention all together?
Or do we wait for the call…the call to service…the call to action, pointing the way we can make the world, our world a better place?
Could it be that that call does rings out …every day… softly, but the volumes down and it is easily drowned out by the din of our daily demands? Or perhaps its just not the call we want to hear… because secretly we are waiting for the day that we will be in position to truly help someone...to be a hero, a big screen moment when we will summons all our courage and jump in a frozen river to save a drowning child or step into traffic to pull someone out about to get hit by a car?
How do we shift our thoughts and realize that there is far greater value in the smallest of actions than in the greatest of intentions. When will we understand the power of an action…any action, regardless the size to cause a reaction which causes yet again a reaction and so on? When will we acknowledge that innately we are all Agents of Peace and the power is ours wield in any degree we choose?
Perhaps our first step would be to turn up the volume on our inner voice…listen to our hearts and trust that as minor as a proposed action may be …it will make a difference!

Saturday, November 15, 2008

Bring Peace Not Pain

BRING Peace not Pain…..that should be easy…like bring chicken not steak...it’s a choice we make with every interaction we have. We just forget that it is a choice and react with instinct…the Fight or Flight instinct that was so crucial for early man has proven itself a determent in the emotional evolution of Man.
In early days survival was directly related to the strength of ones Flight or Flight instinct as well as the ability to institutively identify threats…and many times threats were simply the unknown. With so much of the world unknown when confronted with something new, time spent in discovery often lead to death or destruction. It was those that could identify potential danger and deal with it accordingly that had the greatest chance for survival.
As both Man and society have evolved those innate instincts have also continued to evolve. In Prehistoric time the fight response originally revealed its self in strictly physical behavior, (man fighting his opponent). Today, that has morphed from physical to verbally aggressive behavior as well, and while early mans flight instinct was simply that...to physically move out of harms way, that to has begun to manifest itself in emotional withdrawal as well.
The fear of the unknown has survived in modern man as well, however that too has evolved, no longer limited to the immediate, exterior world around us, the fear of the unknown now lurks in our abstract future thought. This fear has also been feed and nurtured in recent years by the constant barrage of media alerts. Thus leaving us in a perpetual state of stress, with our Fight or Flight instinct in high gear. The result…a hostile and aggressive society…

So where do we go from here? How do we rewire ourselves to automatically respond with LOVE and compassion, how do we work to BRING Peace not Pain into our relationships and encounters with others?
How do learn to trust ourselves and others? How do we work to see ourselves as interconnected with all human beings? How do we lay down our pain and our fears...let loose our betrayals and our quests for revenge to those who have wronged us? How do we break down our protective walls we have constructed that have left us in self imposed isolation? How do we rid ourselves of the destructive emotions the eat away at our core, our core of HOPE and LOVE. How?
Before we can bring PEACE we must know LOVE ,LOVE...LOVE is the answer to all…if our thoughts, intentions and actions are motivated by LOVE, pure LOVE...LOVE of self, LOVE of all Mankind, LOVE of Nature, LOVE of individuals, LOVE of life...the list is endless, if we cloak all we see in white light of LOVE then reacting with hate and anger becomes very difficult if not impossible.
Is it easy, easy to turn our emotions, like a light switch…LOVE on hate off? Yes and no, and easier for some than others yet not impossible for anyone. When we came into the world with the seeds of LOVE were firmly planted. If they took root and grew or lay dormant has much to do with the environment of our birth, and our early years of life. Like a flower seed in a soil, the better the conditions the stronger the flower will grow. The optimum growing condition for LOVE is a nurturing supportive environment, with LOVE the best fertilizer for LOVE. However even to those born under the most challenging of circumstance the seed remains and can be cultivated at anytime.

Friday, November 7, 2008

Where do we store our memories?

Why do we hold on to possessions whose use is no longer of value but are reminiscent of people or times in our past? Do we feel that the objects connect us to that past…does the solid form of the object allows us to imagine our memories as real and tangible as well? Or are they merely a catalyst to recalling that past event? Is it fear that if we part with these items then we may be parting with the memories as well?

For those of us that struggle with the decision of what to keep and what to save…we place values on our things, financial value, convenience value, aesthetic value and emotional value. But what exactly is the value of emotional value? Do we place that above other values? Should we???

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Proof


Innately I have always know that there was more to the world than witnessed by our five senses. I have always believed that we all posses a soul that shares a connection.. a connection to all other souls but with differing degrees. I have always believed that this life is just one chapter in the book of our souls existence. Shall we call this knowing, a spiritual connection.. a core belief..faith? The label ..irrelevant, this knowing I have acceped without question…never expecting nor seeking proof ..but proof has revealed its self.

The proof revealed itself upon the meeting of a stranger..it was as palpable as a hurricane, in a moment I knew this stranger was no stranger to my soul.
How else would you explain the jolt when your soul catapults itself from its elevated place of passive awareness into your head and heart to reveal and reconnect its self to a kindred soul. Like twins torn apart at young ages or loves lost young, that find each other decades later, that connection, that bond of the heart, transcends any feelings of awkwardness or insecurities one may initially feel.
How else would you explain the magnetic connection to another...another human being who’s life mirrors yours only in the facts that you both breath air, need food to survive and have a heart the beats in your chest. Your life experiences differ like the mountains to the oceans, yet you know that all that is immaterial…the packaging of current life holds no stock here. It is heart to heart, soul to soul, our conscious selves are merely the facilitators for the encounter.
Such an encounter is my proof that I have a soul with experiences independent of my current existence.


Sunday, October 19, 2008

Just Today….

If we have just today…just today to make a difference…what would we do…what could we do …what do we want to do?
What is it that pulls at our heart strings…that gnaws on our consciences? Is it global or local …or perhaps is it quite personal?
What stops us from taking the action that our heart dictates? Does its enormity overwhelm us to the point of leaving us paralyzed…or is it seemingly so small and inconsequential that we feel it warrants no action?
Or is it merely a matter of personal economics….lack of time, energy, financial resources?

Have we ever celebrated our inaction?…How about our action?


If we knew that today was our only chance to act…tomorrow…to late…would we act?

Thursday, October 16, 2008

Blog Action Day 2008 POVERTY

As globalization begins to blur our borders, we find our international bonds are being forged more by interdependence and convenience than by true humanitarian goals. The unfortunate result is often seen in in our governments reluctance to engage in areas of the world where the need may be great, yet we perceive no economic value.
What we must come to understand is that the greatest value is not purely economic it is in protecting all mankind, and the responsibility is for all of us to bear…individually and collectively. Individually??


For many of us the daunting enormity of the situation is cause enough for us to humility retreat when faced with tales of starving pregnant mothers who must choose between her children who will eat today, or photo’s of a five year old in India who’s skin is blacken from trying to clean out batteries in windowless rooms so they may have a meal. How can we, with our own mailboxes full of bills, our demanding schedules and our own challenging lives…how can we possibly make a difference?

Actually by helping one person we are changing the life course for their future generations to come. Ok, but how can I …I who is barely keeping the wolf away from my door possible change someone else life??
I recently met a women from Kenya who’s life and life of her family was transformed for the cost of a sewing machine, for less that $100.00 she has created a way to support her family, she is now working to expand her business and help other women in the village support their families by employing them.

So..OK perhaps I can afford to help someone…finding a vehicle to assist in helping can be equally as daunting…we sure don’t want to sent $100.00 and find that $80.00 went to administrative funds…or give to an unscrupulous organization…and who has the time to vett out the good ones? Luckily there are some excellent websites that have done due diligence on many international as well as national programs. Also don’t overlook your own community, is there a local food bank or soup kitchen that accepts donations of food or funds and lastly…and perhaps the most overlooked…someone in you life that could use a little help, unfortunately all too often the responsibility of “helping thy neighbor” has been left to government agencies. It is time here also where we must step up and reach out to one another in need.

We all have the ability to make a difference, and for all of us that do nothing because we lack the ability to do everything… a great deal is lost. Tomorrow what will you do to help?

Monday, October 13, 2008

Small steps can bring great CHANGE...

This music video by Nickelback lauds several examples of individuals who have stood up to injustice, and won. The examples range from Bob Geldof's Live Aid concerts in 1984 to Nelson Mandela's triumphant release from prison in 1989 and election as South Africa's first democratically elected president.

http://www.karmatube.org/?id=38

Monday, October 6, 2008

Choosing Peace

"First keep the peace within yourself, then you can also bring peace to others."
Thomas A Kempis

Why is that although we, the vast majority of the citizens of the world, desire to live in peace …in our hearts, in our relationships and in our global communities,… that peace continues to elude us?
It eludes us because for many of us after surviving the mundane challenges of our daily day we have little reserves left to allocate towards creating peace. In many incidents, the resources we do have, our tools and weapons are limited to benign chatter…“Kitchen Bitchen” with the focus on those in power and the frustration borne of our presumed inability to affect any change, either personally or globally.
It is here where we fall miserably short, for the greatest power…the power to bring about a paradigm shift is in each of us. BRING PEACE NOT PAIN is dedicated to helping each of us to establish/reestablish peace and to connect and know our personal power.
To engage this power for our quest for peace…personal, interpersonal and global peace, we must alter our current way of thinking and subscribe to the following two statements:
1) We are all personally and collectively responsible for creating peace.
2) We all have the ability to create peace, in our hearts, in our relationships and globally.
If it is global peace we strive for…the end of injustices the world over, we must begin the campaign by first conquering the demons in our own hearts and minds and embracing our own PEACE. Accomplished by?.. How?….We must acknowledge and believe that we are responsible for creating or restoring our own inner peace., no longer can we alleviate our guilt over our own inactions by placing the burden of healing on others.
We must look with clarity and love at our inner workings, while knowing that we alone are responsible for our inner peace as we alone posses the power that dictates our reactions to all exterior forces that challenge and threaten us. We must decide where we need to shore up or boundaries and where to open the gates of our hearts and allow love to freely flow.
We must practice forgiveness, forgiveness with not only those who have harmed us but ourselves as well…many times it is personal forgiveness that is the hardest to grant.

With a heart freed by understanding and forgiveness, self-governed by clarity and love we will know peace, from here we must allow conscious thought and decision-making to dictate our actions towards ourselves and others.
Conscious thought and decision-making, that is paramount to healthy interpersonal relationships as well. To BRING Peace not Pain is a choice we make with every interaction we have, unfortunately all too often it seems as we have forgotten and react with instinct. We must remember that WE have control over how we will CHOOSE to respond in any situation…we have to retrain our brains to give pause and evaluate the current circumstance prior to reacting. What are our desired outcomes? Have our previous behaviors achieved them? What is different this time? How will responding with Love and compassion affect the result? How will responding with fear based actions? These are questions we need to ask ourselves and continue to ask ourselves as we interact with others. It is here in this state of awareness and conscious actions that we will see our relationships evolve.
When our hearts are at peace and our relationships are governed by mutual respect, honesty and love we must individually and collectively foster these same guiding principals in our pursuit of global peace. We must seize every opportunity we have to bring peace and love into the lives of others...We must see each other as we are…we must appreciate our similarities and celebrate our difference…. But beyond our individual characteristic…we must believe, we must know …that we are not only all equal and deserving of the same rights and responsibilities but even more importantly… much more importantly that we are one...one body of life, one race...one interconnected whole. Pain and injustice against one, is pain and injustice to all man and the suffering felt by one is shared by all. We must strive to cure each part to be whole, we must stop using and (allowing to be use) fear and intimidation to motivate the actions of others.
As daunting as it may be…it is thru these actions and beliefs that one by one ..community by community we will begin an accelerating and rippling effect on society at large.

Monday, September 29, 2008

Givers and Takers

ACCEPT the LOVE, SEIZE the GOOD…why is that harder for some than… giving the Love…sharing the good?

There are givers and takers, at first blush one might assume that the more challenging task would be in the giving rather than the receiving. However for many of us taking requires a much greater sacrifice... taking requires a drink of humility and trust that for some is just too bitter.

So we quietly attempt to position ourselves in the seat of benefactor …hoping our acts of generosity will mask our inability to receive, but what we fail to see is that we are denying someone else of that very role. What appears altruistic and selfless is in fact our most selfish act...the giving has become the taking and such the taking the giving.

Is this simply another symptom of a hungry ego, a need to feel grand and powerful? Yes and no, ego feed, no doubt, but for many, much more than the need to feel grand is fear…the fear of losing control…the fear of being let down, first by ourselves that we are not capable of answering our own needs...second by others, by allowing dependency on others we are exposing a vulnerability that is often too great a risk.

Trust and Love …again it spirals back to here…like taking a crowbar to a rusted safe as we slowly pry it open the light begins to enter ...changing nothing inside merely illuminating the space...we must pry open our hearts and allow love and trust to irrigate its chambers. From here we will have the ability (if we choose) to cultivate the seeds of faith...faith in ourselves and faith in others and begin to engage in relationships of mutual dependence and support where we will permit others to share not only the joys of our successes but also the pain of our failures. Enjoying...perhaps for the first time in a long time a truly healthy relationship.

MAJOR POINT…. PLEASE do not allow this to be misconstrued in an way as to judge those who give… most who give do so with no ulterior motives, their actions are fueled only by a desire to improve the lives of others.

This is dedicated to those of us who believed we had constructed a fail-safe system to insure the safety of our hearts without realizing the most detrimental effect on our hearts is a lack of love.


Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Perseverance…the key to success or...?

The struggle of the mind to keep itself free from every sort of bondage"
Gardner Murphy

We are taught that perseverance wins the ribbon...and taught rightly so, truly the merits of perseverance are beyond reproach,… but what happens when perseverance becomes the goal….is it possible that we so greatly value perseverance that we turn a blind eye as conditions change and other more viable options appear.

It is said that if a dog spends hours locating and digging for a buried bone and at the very moment his nose discovers its scent and he knows he is minutes away from sinking his teeth into it, someone offers him a different bone… with tail wagging he will happily accept the new bone and walk away from his labors.
Would we...if we have been arduously struggling with a task and as we arrive at the point where we know completion is near …if we are given the option of finishing on our own or being handed the outcome...what would we choose?
For many of us we would choose to finish …in that case have we traded the original goal of a specific outcome for the goal of finishing what we have begun.

That being said ..is perseverance a curse?…a hindrance? ..hardly, the absents of perseverance can guarantee failure at a high rate. Perseverance equates success… isn‘t that the mantra we have practiced, from the beginning we are taught perseverance is a quality found in the most successful, it is the quality we strive to incorporate in all of our challenges. However… is it possible, that cloaked in a cape of perseverance we could be stifling other options…failing to utilize newly acquired information that could positively alter our direction or change our result?

The concern is perseverance for perseverance sake and the self imposed blinders we wear to aid us in keeping our attentions on task, can also prevent us from see other viable options available in achieving our goals... or perhaps even a new ...more suitable goal.

The question to ask is... when a new vision/direction/option comes into play…how do we discern if it is merely a distraction or in fact a truly better alternative?

It is trust …trust, clarity and an open mind …that should guide and govern our productivity and plans. As we, the architect of the plan it is incumbent on us to continuously evaluate the methods and appropriateness of the plan, if we find, thru our diligence, or others, a better way…a different way, we must not be afraid to shift gears…and we certainly should not allow the feeling of failure to dictate our action…for the success of one idea is often borne of the fruits from failure of another.


Sunday, September 7, 2008

Embracing the inevitable…when a change occurs that we fear, finding the strength and skill to exercise our power over the effect of the change.

"Better to light a candle than to curse the darkness."

Chinese Proverb

When we fail to embrace inevitable changes we are abandoning all our inner resources … our creativity, our ingenuity, our strength…those that would allow us the power to craft the outcome of the changes on our lives. When we are faced with a change/pending change that we would never have wished for…but ones we have no control over...it can be major ones…natural disaster…economic downturn…death or illness…or minor ones, changes at work…changes in your community...maybe you were in car accident and although you are OK your new car is damaged ….if we expend the majority of our mental energies lamenting why or how did this/ could this happen to us, we are compounding the situation… we are allowing the situation to own us…to leave us stuck in the weeds.


The challenge for us is to refocus our thoughts, accept the inescapable reality of the situation, while still acknowledging our feelings… be them displeasure, disbelief, sadness or regret…then take control of the situation and decide our next step. From a clear vantage point, we need to see with clarity and honesty all the factors involved, how bad is it?…how does this affect our lives daily/long term? … where does it leave us? That information will allow us to decide what are our options are…this can be the true challenge...to look without predetermined judgment at our options …why they won’t/can’t work …to take the blame, the regret and the disappointment out of the equation… to see the possibilities with an open mind and heart, and then with a steady hand and firm grip take the helm and chart your course…


Although we may wield little or no control over exterior changes that challenge us….how we choose to respond both in our inner thoughts and with our actions is entirely our decision…”We are the Masters of our Fate…We are the Captains of our souls”
Suzi

Monday, September 1, 2008

Change..we cry out for change…yet what do we resist more?

Continuity gives us roots; change gives us branches, letting us stretch and grow and reach new heights. ~Pauline R. Kezer

We cry out for change…yet what do we resist more? How is it that innately we are such creatures of conformity yet our instinct is to be agents of change…how do we manage the two…how do we empower ourselves to make the needed and desired changes. There are many kinds of changes...but for the most part they fall into two categories…the ones we desire and implement and the ones that affect our external life yet we have no control over. For now we will focus on change that we desire…change that we hope will enrich our lives.

What are the changes we want to see...in our own lives…our relationships…our communities? What are we willing to do in order to enact that change? Do we believe that the identified change will warrant the time/energies taken to achieve the change? How will we go about it? What are the tools needed to support the endeavor? What is our game plan? When at first of blush of things not working out as we had planned will we have the will to persevere? It is in the answers to these questions that we will find the basis for implementing our changes.

As daunting as a plan of change can be…it is also most invigorating…it is reminder that we hold the keys to our destiny...that we can achieve our desires.
They say Spring is the time of renewal, a time of new growth, of change…I however believe that fall is the true season of new beginnings…of fresh starts. Perhaps as the air thins and the light sharpens, vistas previously blurred by the summer sun’s haze, are now easily with in our view and with such clarity, contrast and brilliance. For many of us fall brings that same precision and depth of sight inward…to how we see ourselves, to see how far we can go, to see the plans and projects we previously abandoned and neglected as we embraced the allure of summer and life outside, we see again with renewed energy and zest.

If we take that clarity of vision and like a child on the first day of a new school year, think mainly of the new opportunities, yes, last year was important, its lessons provided the foundation on which we continue to build,…it is from here that we begin anew.
As a child September was a time of fresh new notebooks, razor sharp pencils and books that still hold the smell of the ink. It still is …our lives are like those new notebooks…the notebook itself, it’s cover and binding ... is the current structure or framework of our life, but the blank pages …our future…ours to create and enhance. The pencils…the tools we will need to ensure success. The books are our access to knowledge, self knowledge, acquired knowledge and yet to be acquired knowledge, and our willingness to open them.

Like a new student full of hope and energy, look at the situation you are choosing to change, look with clarity and honesty and form the list of the changes you wish to make, then arm yourself with the proper tools… a road map, clearly highlighting both your starting point as well as your desire destination… your itinerary, when and how you will be implementing the needed steps…a clear understanding of the importance of the change, a firm belief that you are capable of achieving it, a vision of your life when the change has taken place, and access to any and all knowledge you have that will aid you in your success.

So as fall arrives, and the stores are stocked with shiny bright new school supplies…shinny new hope, hope that this will be the year…the year I get all my homework done...the year I make the A team….the year I pay attention in class…that this will be a great year….LET THIS BE YOUR YEAR…your season of CHANGE…Change that YOU design!!!
Good Luck…Suzi

Sunday, August 24, 2008

Intentions…. what happens to them on the way to action?

Action expresses priorities.
Mohandas Gandhi

Intentions reveal the best of who we would like to be, or how we would best like to act in a situation…
( little clarity here… by saying BEST, best is meant as level of measure … not, best, as in highest moral fiber…). Be it a lifestyle action…(exercise more, save more money, write more…paint more...eat less …work more…work less), or a relationship action …(do X for someone…stop doing X to someone) we often start out with the greatest of intentions … but somewhere along way…somewhere, they can get a tad diluted or even completely neglected.
Why is that? We know what we want… we know how we want to perform in a certain way...we acknowledge what we are going to do, what our intentions are...and yet??? Our intentions change?? Did we set too high expectations in the first place? Most likely no…most likely our intentions were not supported by our priorities. At first glance, we might say, “no, I really wanted to do….but …..got in the way”. More often than not what prevents us from achieving our intentions is current behavior patterns. By allowing something else to take precedent over our intentions, what we often find is our reluctance for change.
By identifying change, (reluctance of) as the source of the impediment we can begin to rewire the flow of thought, conscious and unconscious to be in line with our intentions.
Take for example, exercise, you have an extremely busy lifestyle, work, social obligations and what time is left you prefer to enjoy quietly with family and friends. However you are often tired but you know that you need exercise to feel your best, so you tell yourself you will begin to exercise everyday after work. Now although your intentions are sound and justified, unless you begin an inner dialogue with yourself identifying the needed change ( time spent with family and friends verses time spent exercising) and can convince yourself that the change will be more beneficial to your overall life…as committed to your intention as you believe you are …most likely it will not come to fruition.
For our intentions to yield results we must employ our inner GPS and clearly identify and acknowledge the obstacles, the current behaviors that may impede our success. Then decide if the compensation is worth changing them.
Think of an intention as a new enthusiastic Chairman of the Board and your inner thoughts and behaviors the reluctant “Old Guard”…they have their comfort zone and are quite happy there. To turn the tides you must have their support...and that will be gained through understanding of how things are currently operating then identifying the advantages of the change and show a solid plan on how to implement the change.
So with your next intention...no matter the level of intensity make a list of what changes you would need to make in order to complete your intention…(thought changes, lifestyle changes, concrete changes..) look at how the changes will affect you…weigh them and if the payoff from the implementing the intention out weights the results from keeping things as they are…you have a strong chance for success!! Good Luck.
Suzi

Sunday, August 17, 2008

Inspired by Michael Phelps - The Power of Imagination

"Nothing is impossible, with so many people saying it couldn't be done, all it takes is an imagination, and that's something I learned and something that helped me."
Michael Phelps (on winning his eighth gold medal)

Imagination….a gift…a tool… an innate ability…it is what allows us to see what has yet to exist…it’s power can aid us in being limitless or limited in our thoughts and actions…


Why are we so afraid of our imagination...do we automatically imagine the worst of any given situation? Can we work to redirect…to envision the best of the best. What if when we were faced with a situation and our minds went directly to worst case scenario we merely acknowledged that possibility than allowed our imaginations free reign to explore all of the potential positive outcomes and ways to accomplish them? Many of us have harnessed our imaginations to not only keep us from seeing possible negative possibilities, but from also from seeing the great potential of success, for fear that we will not achieve them and can’t bear to be letdown.


If our thoughts are our reality...can we better deploy our imagination to create our world of choice…to create our life of choice? I believe we can…I believe if we can envision a life of peace…a world of peace, than we can stretch our imaginations and find the solutions needed to take us there.


So action item for today…embrace your imagination…give it the freedom to take you where you want to be. Sit for a moment and indulge in free thought…ask yourself how you would like to live your life…let your mind go…no parameters...no stopping yourself because “that could never happen” or “you are thinking to big...to grand” let your thoughts just go and enjoy the ride. Life is full of possibilities...and our imaginations are the keys to achieving them.
Suzi

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

We are ONE

"If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other".
Mother Teresa

How do we achieve peace…local peace to global peace, how do we work to put an end to any and all injustices inflicted upon mankind?
By understanding on an intellectual level, feeling on an emotional level...believing on a spiritual level that we are not only all equal and deserving of the same rights and responsibilities but even more importantly, much more importantly that we are one...one body of life, one race...one interconnected whole. Pain and injustice against one, is pain and injustice to all man and the suffering felt by one is shared by all. We must strive to cure each part to be whole.


Cultural differences, like many things that we don’t understand can be frightening and threatening. That is why at every opportunity when we are being introduced to persons of varying faiths, nationalities or lifestyles we must endeavor to learn about each other …through that learning we will begin to recognize our similarities and appreciate our differences.

The goal is in no way to try to change peoples traditions or practices, we should not strive to be a melting pot were all of our difference blend together to an unrecognizable state. We must instead see our selves as a beautiful mosaic... where it is the individuality of each piece that creats the splender and the serength of the whole.

As globalization begins to blur our borders our international bonds are being forged more by interdependence and convenience than by true humanitarian goals. The unfortunate result is often seen in in our reluctance to engage in areas of the world where the need may be great, yet we perceive no economic value. What we must come to understand is that the greatest value is not purely economic it is in protecting all mankind.

In our quest for global peace and the end of grave injustices it is easy to engage in rhetoric criticizing those in power yet taking no personal responsibility for the state of affairs in the world today.
One could easily debate that since they wielded little power over those “in charge” they were in fact powerless to affect any change. This is not true, each of us possesses not only the power to affect peaceful changes but are completely responsible to do so. We are it…we are one…we are the them.. we are the government.. we are the world and we are one...collectively and individually responsible for the world.
So today, open your heart, use your head and
Bring Peace not pain to all you encounter...Love like hate is contagious.
Suzi
Xox

Saturday, August 9, 2008

Thorn Removers or Thorn Cultivators

A friend and I happened to be walking by a patch of beautiful wildflowers when I started picking a few. He pulled out a pocket knife and asked it I wanted him to cut them, I said no, I was fine just snapping the stalks. Until I saw some beach roses that happen to be unbelievable thorny, I asked if he would please clip me one as I couldn’t touch it due to all of the sharp thorns. As he clipped I walked on and continued picking a few here and there. When we arrived at the car he handed me the roses, a minute later he asked if I had noticed that he had also cut off all the thorns. I said I hadn’t, but I’m sure once back at the office when I was arranging them I would have. He laughed and knowing me so well said “and you would have thought“, “I’m so lucky, of all the thorny stems I got one with out any thorns” I laughed because he was right, I would have thought that.
The next day when walking in the same spot I chuckled, thinking about the story, then it occurred to me …yes I would have thought that and yes, I would have been correct, I was so lucky to get a thorn free stem. How the stem became thorn free was irrelevant. The fact was I was given a beautiful rose that I could hold pain free, unlike the other roses on the bush.
Often we overlook and don't give credit to our most powerful gifts, the people in our lives, the Thorn Removers, those people that many times, quietly make our lives a more pleasant place. Thorn Removers can be complete strangers or members of our inner circle, often they remove obstacles with out us ever even knowing were there in the first place. Thorn Removers are the opposite of Thorn Cultivators those who create challenging issues in our lives.
Let us work to identify and celebrate the Thorn Removers in our lives and strive to emulate them in the lives of others.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

FEAR..Why do we feel compelled to foster a fear based society?

“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”
Marcus Aurelius:

Why do we feel compelled to foster a fear based society? We allowed the government to promote fear as a way to try to bolster patriotism. We use fear to motivate and discipline our youths. If we know that it is fear that shackles us to a life of mediocrity, a life self limited, why do we continually embrace fear?
It has been said that fear is one of our innate emotions and a valuable tool for survival…with this I have no argument. Initial fear response can heighten all of our senses giving us an acute awareness of potentially dangerous situations.
It is the consistent state of fear that many of us live in that brings detrimental results…to both our physical as well as mental health. Fear can become disease like…contagious, fast growing affecting all aspects of our lives. Living in this state also begins to cloud our ability to clearly see/determine truly dangerous situations.
So how do we recognize/differentiate initial fear as a true warning and the irrational fear that cripples us. How do we accept one as the valuable tool it is and protect ourselves from the other. By being aware...looking at the situation with clarity and honesty, by evaluating outcomes. Is this a situation that truly gives us reason to fear for our safety or our we being held prisoner by baseless thoughts?
If the latter, it is only by facing the fear, that we can free ourselves from it. Ask yourself “what is the worst thing that can happen in this situation“...imagine that outcome, even if it is totally devastating… look at it, then look at what happens after...what are your options to deal with what comes next...remember you are just looking at it hypothetically don’t let fear stop you from looking at the situation. By not looking at it you are in no way keeping it from happening. You are practicing owning the situation not letting fear own it or you. What will happen will happen whether we worry or not, but we will be much healther without the worry and fear.
_______________
Once a new client came in my office, as we were talking he kept jumping up to look out he window...finally I asked him what was the matter...he said he was afraid that his car (brand new BMW) was going to get hit. I asked if worrying and constant checking was going to it protected it?
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Fear of change is one of man’s greatest fears… change of career, home, relationship, etc, when faced with theses changes the following questions are very helpful in finding clarity in your thoughts.
Thinking about your present situation answer these questions:
1) Where am I now?
2) What is good about it/ what is working here?
3) What do I have to lose if I no longer _____ here?
4) If I stay here what is the best I can expect?
5) Are my emotional, physical, financial, spiritual needs being met...to what extent?
6) What are the external forces holding me here?
Thinking about the future answer these questions:
7) Where do I think I want to_____?
8) What is good about it/ why would it work for me ?
9) How will my life change?
10) What is the best thing that could come out of this? Can I handle that?
11) What is the worst thing? Can I handle that?
12) If I didn’t have to worry about_______ would I make the change?
13) Do I anticipate emotional, physical, financial, spiritual needs be met...to what extent?

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

Choice...what does that mean? Is it a freedom to relish or a responsibility to bear?

Both...by accepting the freedom of though and action that choice affords us, we are also accepting the responsibility for the outcome (or lack of) due to a decision.
For some the fear of making the wrong decision is so great, that they would rather relinquish their decision making powers than be held accountable. In doing so they are surrendering their greatest power.


It is that power of choice that grants us our greatest freedom The freedom to choose what we want out of life and the freedom to make the choices that support that goal. The freedom to think. The freedom to believe what we want to believe. The freedom to choose who we want to be. The freedom to choose how we will interpret the actions of others, and most importantly how we will allow those actions to affect us mentally and how we will react to those actions. We are free to choose what we will bring to our relationships and what we will take away from them. We are given the opportunity of choice every day, every hour, every minute…prior to each thought or action we take we have the ability to choose what that action or thought will be, and post every encounter with external influences we have the ability to choose our responses.

Often times we haven’t consciously relinquish our ability to choose, we have just forgotten our power to exercise it and we respond with instinct. It is our default system that submit our responses. Unfortunately, those initial instincts don’t always yield the most desired results. Whether it is an innate instinct like our “Fight or Flight’ instinct, or reacting to a situation using old information instead of seeing the situation with clarity and freshness…being blindly reactive, either can hamper the outcome .
What do we want out of relationships… relationships with ourselves, with others...global relationships? Do we desire healthy, compassionate, safe, peaceful ones? Are we acting in a way as to support that objective?
For many of us, daily interactions with others afford us countless opportunities to choose if we will be agents of peace. The opportunities present themselves with all from total strangers to those in our inner circle, our work is to allow our desire for healthy, peaceful relationships and outcomes to dictate our actions.


If we strive to be agents of PEACE, then we must work to be proactive as opposed to reactive is dealing with others. In being proactive we learn to take pause and be cognizant of the fact that bringing PEACE is the outcome we desire. That may be as simple as a smile or allowing someone to go in front of us in traffic, or as challenging as stopping before reacting in the same “knee jerk reaction” when confronted repeatedly with aggressive behavior by the same offender. If PEACE truly is our quest, we must keep that in the forefront of our minds and remembering, that the most frequent and important choices we make is how we will engage with others and ourselves.

Saturday, August 2, 2008

Clarity...mental clarity, clarity of thought, clarity of vision...paramount to achiving inner peace.

Clarity

“That inner voice has both gentleness and clarity. So to get to authenticity, you really keep going down to the bone, to the honesty, and the inevitability of something.”
Meredith Monk


Without being fully cognizant of one current state of being as well as the events that have brought us there, one cannot begin to heal past wounds.
It is like attempting to chart a course knowing the destination but not the starting coordinates.
It is from where that first step initiates that determines the direction of the journey. Our inner journey is no different, if we do not honestly and completely look at ourselves, our total selves, our inner selves, our outer selves, our wounds, our hurts, our disappointments, both those perpetrated by ourselves as well as by others, we cannot expect to move forward.

To achieve clarity of mind is to step back and really look inside our hearts and minds, like opening a suitcase take out each wound, and really look at it, not wallow in it, just look at it and accept it. Whether it is yours to own or not..irreverent, it is a part of you... but not the whole of you, unless of course you allow it to be.
Only from this state of clarity and acceptance can your journey truly begin.

Why do we hold on to pain... pain inflicted by others or self imposed?

"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of throwing it at someone else; you are the one who gets burned"
Buddha


FORGIVNESS

Do we believe that we are punishing those that caused the hurt by holding on to the pain? Or do we believe there is redemption in suffering? Have we so blurred the borders of pain and pleasure that we can’t differentiate between the two? Do we so teeter on the brink of an emotional void that the presence of any feeling is a welcome reminder that we are still alive? Do we believe that pleasure must be born of pain, without out one the other can not exist? Or does one derive pleasure from pain?

Whatever the motivation, many of us not only hold on to the pain, we revisit the wounds, ensuring that they stay fresh and open…like picking at a scab, as the body works to heal us, we deliberately work to impede that healing.

Holding on to this pain and suffering is keeping us on a self imposed tether line, allowing us to venture only so far, only so far on our road to inner peace and personal evolvement. Again it comes back to LOVE, self LOVE.

When it is self LOVE that governs our thoughts and actions, that demands the highest and best quality of physical, spiritual and emotional life, then we have no option other than forgiveness.

It is in forgiveness, forgiveness of ourselves and others that we will find our inner peace.

Our power and responsibility to create peace.

"Your own mind is a sacred enclosure into which nothing harmful can enter except by your permission."
Ralph Waldo Emerson


To work toward personal, interpersonal and global peace we must subscribe to the two following statements:

1) We are all personally and collectively responsible for creating peace.
2) We all have the ability to create peace, in our hearts, in our relationships and globally.


To talk about being responsible for peace, we must first acknowledge that we are responsible for creating or restoring our own inner peace. Requesting that we take responsibility for our peace in no way underscores any pain or suffering we have endured. For those that have been personally persecuted or have first hand lay witness to a life of injustice and pain, finding that inner peace may be a far more daunting task.

Or perhaps not…perhaps its equally hard for just us...the ordinary people…the ones who’s wins and losses can’t be found in any book or on the news, those of us who suffer silently from the benign chill of the world rather than the Artic frost, to turn a loving eye on ourselves and others.

I would never attempt to rate one’s suffering against another’s, nor begin to judge the affect of ones life on any human heart. We are all wired differently, my thought is just that suffering on any level can harden ones heart and we need to work to soften it.

Going on the assumption that we have all been hurt, even if we have lived a life entirely supported by the most loving and nurturing people we can not walk away unscathed by the events that have unfolded in our lifetimes. We all need to heal… heal our hearts and embrace peace.

So if much of the pain we feel has been cause by others, how do we take responsibility for our peace? By understanding that although we may have little control over events that happen to us, we do posses complete control over how we wish to allow those events to effect us.

We are “Captains of our souls, Masters of our fate”. How we see the world and our place in it is entirely up to us. We are the stewards of our souls and of our hearts. In many ways, for some ,granting someone else the power to form our lives relives us of any responsibility to the outcome. It allows us full admission in the blame game.

Although living in a controlled environment one may endure a life of pain and frustration, for some that pain and frustration may be alleviated by embracing the role of victim. Not to say there are not true victims, every minute, everyday, there are victims, victims of violent crimes, victims of natural disasters, as well as victims of circumstance, and not to say that the wounds from theses acts are not real, or they do not bleed. They are real, they do bleed, they bleed from our skin and they bleed into our hearts and our souls. But the power to stop the bleed is inside of us.

The power to govern our hearts and souls is ours alone, one cannot have access to the inner sanctions of our hearts and souls without our permission. We must believe that the true power is the power inside us is ours, ours alone to protect or give away.

How do we achive that?


If it is global peace we strive for…the end of injustices the world over, we must begin the campaign by first conquering the demons in our own hearts and minds and embracing our own PEACE.
Accomplished by?
... How? By looking with clarity and love at our inner workings, while knowing that we alone are responsible for our inner peace as we alone posses the power that dictates our reactions to all exterior forces that challenge and threaten us.
By practicing forgiveness, forgiveness with not only those who have harmed us but ourselves as well…many times it is personal forgiveness that is the hardest to grant.
Then with peace in our hearts we must allow conscious thought and decision-making to dictate our actions towards others.
Remembering that WE have control over how we will CHOOSE to respond in any situation…the decision as to whether we will bring PEACE or pain is entirely ours.
Only then will true peace begin to spill into our interpersonal relationships, which will then begin an accelerating and rippling effect on society at large.

"When I was a young man, I wanted to change the world.
I found it was difficult to change the world, so I tried to change my nation.
When I found I couldn't change the nation, I began to focus on my town.
I couldn't change the town and as an older man, I tried to change my family.
Now, as an old man, I realize the only thing I can change is myself, and suddenly I realize that if long ago I had changed myself, I could
have made an impact on my family.
My family and I could have made an impact on our town.
Their impact could have changed the nation and I could indeed have changed the world.”
Rabbi Israel Salanter